Are You Afraid to Face Your Money?
I’m not sure what national awareness theme we should celebrate in November, but I have decided to dedicate this month to financial wellness. Who do I contact to make this official?
But, seriously, as we move towards the end of yet another year, I’ll ask you:
Have you met your financial goals for this year?
Have you given any serious thought, energy, or time to getting yourself financially healthy?
And then I’ll ask, “Are you afraid to face your money?”
Does that seem like a weird question? Most people would say they are not afraid of money. They might even jokingly respond that they are doing everything possible to make sure they make more it or have enough. And yet, 90% of our population has no clue what to do with money, how to make it work for them, or what to do to keep it from bleeding out of their lives like an open wound.
I, like many, struggled for years with money. It was one of those antagonistic, sometimes loving, sometimes all disturbing relationships. Sometimes, I spent sleepless nights with the elusive money, and I relished and frolicked with it at other times. The all-powerful money was at my call and whim one moment, and the next second it was evasive and withholding. It seemed I could no more control it’s mood than I could control my own.
Money, like so many other important areas of my life, was completely responding to my inner world and my belief system about what it meant to have money and, even more important, what it meant to feel like it could be so scarce.
Probably, like many of you, it was not a question of whether I could make money. I was quite capable at the hustle. I mean, after all, I had been working since I was 14 years old, and certainly knew how to get what I needed. The real problem was buried in my beliefs about money and how I viewed money. Once, I worked on my money blueprint and resolved some of my childhood issues and discarded my adult scarcity mentality, well, money and I took on a more fulfilling and abundant relationship.
Indeed, that was only part of the story. The next part was getting real with myself about why my money had a tendency to run out the door as soon as we started getting close. In other words, once I understood what might be blocking me emotionally with money, I then had to take concrete steps to build a longer-term, committed relationship with money. And, so, like many other areas of my life that needed my attention and focus, I drank a nice heavy dose of courage, and I embarked on the next phase of the journey by diving into my relationship with money and arming myself with hard facts about my money situation. Trying to avoid my relationship with money was like trying to avoid eating. You can starve yourself for a while, but eventually, you need to eat or you will perish. And, yes, I would argue that examining your relationship with money is as important as a healthy diet. After all, nearly every aspect of our lives is impacted by money.
So many of us have failed to educate ourselves about money. It is truly one of the biggest differences between how the wealthy hold on to their money and seem to just make oodles more, and the rest of us, who think some magical pill is going to come along and heal our lives (usually in the form of the lottery, which statistically speaking, you are more likely to die in a plane crash before you win the lottery. I know, morbid, but, nonetheless, true). Anyway, I digress; the point is that you have to become educated about how money works. You can’t keep shying away from this process and expect money to start suddenly working for you.
I often hear, people, especially women, talking about the money realm. They say things like, “I just don’t understand that money stuff,” or “You might as well be speaking to me in another language.” And, it may certainly feel like that when you first start out. However, like every other area of life, getting educated around money requires tenacity, diligence, and a commitment to the process. Once you determine that you will learn everything you need to about your relationship with money, well then, you can start to change this relationship in a real way that will help you begin to dramatically increase your income and accumulate wealth.
Diana Quinones is one of those women that got courageous and started taking a long, hard look at her relationship with money. Keep your eye out, as I will share Diana’s blog post, “Love and Money” with you this month. I thank Diana for her vulnerability, courage, and transparency, so that others could learn from her story.
My loves, like everything else, we can only make substantial long-term changes and improve our lives, if we get real with ourselves and start to face our truth.
¡Pa’lante Siempre! ¡Con Luz y Paz! Cynthia
(Forward Always! With Light and Peace!)